Kevin O’Leary has talked a lot about marriage and money. Many people notice his advice about keeping finances separate. It makes sense that people want to protect what they have earned over years of working, saving, and investing. Wanting to keep your money safe is a normal instinct.
The real problem is not wanting independence. It’s the fact that people believe when they are married and keep separate accounts that this means those accounts belong solely to them. The fact is that unless you have a prenuptial or postnuptial agreement which recognizes your separate accounts as your separate property, those assets that you earned during your marriage and then saved in a brokerage, checking and/or savings account in your name alone are likely marital money to be equitably divided between you and your spouse in the event of a divorce. I can’t tell you how many clients tell me during their initial intake that they kept their assets separate and titled in their name alone and therefore they aren’t concerned about having to split the assets with their spouse. The truth is that how an account is titled doesn’t much matter in New York family law. What matters is the source of the monies in the account and if they are monies earned during the marriage, they are likely to be equitably divided. That is New York law.
So many people are surprised during divorce. They kept separate bank accounts and paid their own bills, thinking their money was protected. But New York law will likely classify those assets as marital property unless the account constitutes inherited or gifted property from someone other than your spouse. Worse yet, if you commingled your inherited property with the monies you earned during the marriage, you may not even receive a dollar for dollar credit for the inherited property unless you can properly trace those monies.
This isn’t about personal beliefs. It’s about what the law really says.
Why O’Leary’s Advice Sounds So Reasonable
The advice is simple: keep your own finances and don’t mix everything together.
For many people, this feels empowering. Knowing what you earn and own matters. Everyone should understand their household finances.
But this is where people get tripped up.
Just because you keep accounts separate does not mean the law will see your money as separate.
How New York Looks at Married Money
New York uses equitable distribution. This means the court divides marital property in a way that is fair, but not always equal. First, the court decides what is considered marital property.
This is the part most people miss.
Income earned while married is usually marital property, no matter what account it is in unless you have a prenuptial agreement or a postnuptial agreement that says something different.
If you earn a paycheck after you are married, that income does not stay separate just because it goes into an account with your name on it. The same is true for bonuses, commissions, and other compensation earned during the marriage.
This is usually the moment someone pushes back.
“But it’s my account.”
I hear this a lot. But legally, whose name is on the account does not determine if the money is marital property.
How People Accidentally Create Marital Property
Worse yet, so many people get caught in the trap of turning their separate property into marital property. This happens a lot with people who try hard to keep their finances separate. On paper, it seems simple, but in real life it often is not.
Here are situations that come up constantly.
- Paychecks earned after the wedding go into an individual account, which held your premarital money. Poof – you just commingled your premarital account with marital monies and now it’s impossible to trace.
- You then used that same account that held your premarital money and your marital paychecks to pay bills. The problem is that you now don’t know whether what is left in the account is your separate premarital money or your marital money. The money was all fungible. I once conducted a deposition and the person I was deposing said exactly that. He literally said how can you expect me to trace that money when it’s all fungible and I said case closed!
- Stock compensation that was a bonus paid for work performed before the marriage vests while married and is placed into the same account that holds premarital money and paychecks and bonuses earned during the marriage. Unfortunately you just lost that separate property component of your premarital stock compensation bonus because you commingled it with marital property. then to make matters even more dire, money moves between accounts because it is convenient.
As you can see from the above examples, keeping your separate property separate is complicated. This is why it is so important to consult with a trusted family law attorney and to have that prenuptial agreement drafted, signed and acknowledged before you get married. Many people think that by not using a joint account, you will protect their money. But often, the law does not see it that way.
This is where frustration sets in.
Why This Blows Up During Divorce
Divorce is stressful. Learning that your money is not as protected as you thought can make it harder.
People are often surprised by this. It can turn simple cases into long and costly ones.
Most clients say the same thing.
“I thought I was protecting myself.”
Often, people rely on assumptions that are not based on what the law actually says.
Financial Independence Is Not the Same as Legal Protection
The confusion comes from thinking that how you handle your money will control what happens legally.
You might feel financially independent but still create marital property. Even if you keep things separate, the law may still see your income as shared.
This happens a lot.
What Couples Should Understand Before There Is a Problem
New York divorce law looks at when and how money comes in, and how assets are handled during marriage.
Account structure alone does not control classification.
Intent matters, but documentation matters more.
Assumptions cost people money in divorce.
This is why advice from the media does not always explain everything.
A More Practical Way to Think About Money in Marriage
Television thrives on certainty. Divorce law does not.
The biggest risk is assuming you know how the law will treat your money choices.
By the time divorce starts, it is usually too late to undo those assumptions. That is why clarity matters early. Before conflict. Before lawyers. Before things harden.
If you have questions, it is better to ask about New York law sooner rather than later.
Lisa Zeiderman, Esq.
New York Family Law Attorney